My Boy…
If I am going to be completely honest I have spent the last few months smiling profusely, crying and even sobbing on long rides to and from work. Sometimes I did both simultaneously making for one crazy looking woman if you happened to get a glimpse of me! I can’t tell you how many times my children put their arms around me and said “mãe what’s wrong?” But I didn’t know how to answer because I didn’t know exactly what was wrong…until now.
Fact is, the smiling & crying was not because anything was wrong but because everything was right…everything was just as it should be and the feeling of awe, proudness and complete love made the smiles and tears flow.
Now with one deep breath and a box of tissues by my side I dedicate this to the boy that is now a young man…this one is for you Jordan.
Meu amor JoJo,
It’s 9:29am on Sunday 21st of November 2021 but, I actually started writing this in my heart at 8:50pm on Thursday the 20th of May 2004, the day I gave birth to you, my love, my light…Jordan Lettieri Pereira.
First photo…
4 months gestation, I’m sure your feet were already a size 8!
All those smiles and tears I wrote about earlier have been a result of your impending year 12 graduation and formal, faced with the end of an era I found myself remembering how we got here and…my heart felt a type of pride and love I have never felt before. Amor, you didn’t pop out with a “how to raise me” manual in hand, trust me I checked! So, everything I have ever felt as a result of raising you and being your mother has come as a “new” feeling and or experience for me and…this graduating thing was no different.
Speaking of popping out…
Baking…
Growing a human, also known as “human submarine” as you like to call it.
You came into this world after a gruelling 21 hours of a pain I never knew existed, it bloody hurt and silly (some would say stupid!) me decided not to have an ounce of pain relief. My pain relief at the time was knowing that with every contraction I was one step closer to meeting one of the loves of my life and…I was not disappointed, ever!
You came into this world with such calm and a look of “here I am again”. Your dazzling light eyes combined with your gentle soul had many approach me to say you were an Indigo Child…call it what you want but yes, you came here with a different type of “energy” and I was given the privilege to guide you along the way.
Gentle Soul…
Your gaze, your story.
We have all heard “those” stories when it comes to raising children and unfortunately most of the time they are made up of bad and difficult phases. Yeah, sometimes it is hard, f#&@ing hard and it gets bad BUT…I think I hit the jackpot when it comes to raising you amor.
Apart from crying from falling all the time you hardly ever complained. We did eventually find out that you kept on falling because your feet were always so big but, you know what they say…”big feet BIG…socks” ;)
Your infant years did come with some difficult times for me amor and that’s because I was learning how to be your mãe. Lucky for me you were patient and showered me with sloppy kisses and hugs that were sometimes more of a head butt than an actual hug but…you loved me unconditionally and with that taught me that although I wanted to be your perfect mum, that you would love me just the way I am…imperfect in every way.
I was also blessed with having the help of your grandmothers, two strong and amazing woman that in their own way showed me how to be a mum. Your second mothers, for that I am forever grateful to you mãe and Ana Bella…amo vocês de coração.
Although I’d like to think I was your “first love” ,I am pretty sure that football took that title very early on. Thank the lord we have not “evolved” enough to birth a child with a toy in hand because you would have surely come out holding a foot ball…ouch!
Up until today I thought your jersey number 6 happened “out of the blue”, a number you were once given and it stuck but, nope. I should have known better, destiny my love…destiny. You my son chose this number and I am sure you didn’t even realise it, JLP6 was created by YOU…here is all the proof you need to know that the saying “what is meant to be is within me” fits you like a glove.
Destiny…
JLP6, pondering 3 and choosing 6, you have control…yesterday, today and forever.
Of course I am proud of your achievements at school and in football, what parent wouldn’t be?! You have played for QLD and travelled to Barcelona to represent Australia with the Australian Futsal team and even played at Brisbane City Football Club…the club that brought your Vó Beto over to Australia from Brazil in 1985…the very reason the Lettieri family migrated to Australia!
Generations…
Side by side with one of your hero’s and, in front of a BCFC team photo taken in the 80’s.
JoJo, you have been awarded countless academic awards whilst in primary and high school…BUT…there is no award or achievement that beats kindness, respect and loyalty and that…is what you have in spades, I am truely blessed.
Knowing wrong from right and being true to your core values is an attribute I admire in you, one you have always had and never swayed on…your morals are set in stone and that is what matters above all.
Boy to man…
Your very first Brazilian jersey and your current jersey, this photo says a thousand words without having to say anything at all.
Once upon a time you’d run into my arms and place your head on my chest, now at over 185cm tall and the fossils (as you call me) here at 165cm it is I that place my head on your chest. Although the tables have turned in so many ways one table that will never turn is the one where I get to say “I love you more” because amor…I always will.
Pure love…
Endless respect, support & love.
I don’t know what I did to deserve the honour and privilege of being your mãe Jo, but whatever it was I aced it as I was blessed with YOU.
As you take the step into adulthood I want you to remember one thing and one thing alone and that is to always be true to yourself. By doing so you will always stay in line with your morals, continue to be kind and caring, honest and loving and…have peace in your heart.
Failure my love doesn’t exist when you do what your heart beats for.
Take the shot at goal and if you miss at least you took the shot…
Smile at a stranger and if they don’t smile back at least you shared a smile…
Ask the girl out and if she says no at least you won’t wonder “what if”…
Give way in traffic and if you don’t get a thank you at least you were kind…
Say I Love You to those you love and if you don’t hear it back at least you’ll never have to wonder if they knew how much they meant to you…
Bliss…
Remember the feeling of finding your “package” amongst the bubbles? That is the feeling you will get when you don’t let fear stop you in life…pure bliss!
*I will forever embarrass you, it’s part of being a mum!
JoJo, thank you for making me a mum and helping shape me because even though you don’t know meu amor…you are one of the reason I am the woman I am today.
And never EVER forget I am here for you no matter what.
Be Kind, Be Great, Be You.
I LURF YOU, Mãe
